Wednesday, September 19, 2007

Ask Not for Whom the Bell LOLs, Dept.

Here's something y'all can take to the bank, actually a two-fer:
1) every crap physical comedy released in the course of a summer will feature one retard's assertion that it's "laugh-out-loud funny!";
2) it won't be.

I was throwing out some newspapers today and came upon a full-page ad for Rush Hour 3. Sure enough, "Monica Jackson"--she's the morning news anchor at KVVU-TV/FOX and a woman well-versed in film criticism what with her previous gig as Morning Traffic Anchor in Greensboro, North Carolina--is quoted as saying this addition to the Chris Tucker oeuvre was, yes, "laugh-out-loud funny."

Now, your sobsister was forced to sit through the trailer for this, ummm, what's a nicer phrase for it than "repellent piece of shit"?...well, we'll call it a "film" for argument's sake, not once but twice. And I can state without fear of contradiction that it was most emphatically not "laugh-out-loud funny." It wasn't even smile-out-loud amusing. It was mostly grimace-out-loud annoying. I heard no laughing-out-loud from among the other assembled patrons either. What I could hear over the din of things crashing and breaking and flying on-screen. Not to mention the piquant verbal byplay that has come to characterize Tucker-Chan dialogue. The sort of thing one might expect Noël Coward to script if they dug him up and plunked his remains in front of a typewriter tomorrow.

So, yes. "Laugh-out-loud funny." Avoid it as you would outrages against your virtue, children. Avoid it as you would anything labelled "chocolatey". Because it won't be. Ever ever ever.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

Where as I felt that it was the sort of thing one might expect Noël Coward to script if they'd dug him up, burned his remains then scattered them in front of a typewriter.

You musta liked the film more than I did.

the sobsister said...

The film?
I was repelled by the previews.

Anonymous said...

Oh yeah.. that's right.
Ya know, I have a feeling that I don't really pay enough attention to things.. for instance, that preview was on TV a kajillion times and I never paid any real attention to it.
Guess I deserved what I got.